The modern woman’s guide to being a little bit bolder when it comes to love.
We love Downton Abbey, but ladies waiting on gentlemen callers? Eh, not so much. If you see a guy you want to meet, or want to date a guy you already know, there’s nothing to keep you from initiating action – except, maybe, knowing how to make your move.
For starters, you don’t want to play it too cool or coy, but you also don’t want to go all man-eater on him any more than you’d want to be prey to some slick pick-up artist. And even though it’s been decades since we were green-lighted to make the first move, many of us still feel uncomfortable putting that anointment into action: only 11 percent of women say they’ve actually asked a guy out in the past year, according to a Match.com survey of more than 5 000 people.
Then there’s the fact that some men are feeling marginalised these days because they’ve been hit a little harder than women have during the economic downturn – and the last thing you want to do is brazenly stomp all over his last bastion of manhood. So how can you move the ball down the field? Be honest, direct and authentic about what you want from a guy and you can’t go wrong. “I don’t believe in playing games or following rules,” says Dr Elna Rudolph, WH sexpert and clinical head of the Intercare Centre for Sexual Health. “Be frank about what you want but in a fun way, without sounding too demanding.” Whether you want to initiate a conversation or try a contortionist move in bed, make sure your advances will be well received by following these strategies.
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