By Korin Miller, photography courtesy of Instragram
J.Lo apparently hired a private investigator – but is that a good idea?
You’re well aware that cheating happens, and it’s terrifying to think that it could happen to you. And that fear can make people go to extreme lengths to protect themselves like, say, hiring a private investigator to tail your S.O.
That’s reportedly what Jennifer Lopez did after she suspected that her boyfriend Alex Rodriguez was cheating on her, Us Weekly reports. “He found out and they had a huge fight,” a source tells the magazine. “But they’re working through it.” Apparently, J.Lo’s fears started in June, right around when the National Enquirer published an interview with A-Rod’s alleged former mistress, Lauren Hunter.
READ MORE: “I Cheated – Should I Tell My Partner?”
J. Lo was reportedly worried that her relationship with A-Rod was too good to be true, so…she had someone follow him. “She’s really into Alex and wants it to work,” the source says. “So she’s trying to control as much as she can.”
While hiring a private investigator probably isn’t in your budget, it also isn’t advisable even if you can afford it. “General rule of thumb: If you are hiring a P.I. in your relationship, it may be time to leave,” says licensed clinical psychologist Dr Ramani Durvasula, author of Should I Stay or Should I Go?
If you suspect your partner is cheating on you, Durvasula says it’s important to communicate with them and ask what’s going on. Of course, they may deny it, but it’s crucial to indicate why you’re concerned and see if your partner is willing to listen. Maybe you’re afraid that your partner is cheating because you can never reach them when you’re not together, or they’re just acting differently lately—it’s possible that they may be unintentionally behaving in a way that seems off when nothing bad is actually going on. But, it’s possible something is up, too.
If you have some kind of evidence that shady business is going down, Durvasula says you should approach your partner about it, hear them out, and then think about the implications of their answer.
It’s not easy when you think your partner is cheating, and Durvasula says that most people don’t handle it with grace (although, that’s understandable). “More often than not, we want ‘evidence’ and ‘proof,’ and the answers often don’t come,” she says.